Got Milk?

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Sara, Tabitha, Scott.

Subject: Cleaning

Tabitha walks into the apartment, her nose picked up the pine-fresh scent of cleaning supplies. Looking around she notices Scott is cleaning the kitchen table.

“Am I in the right apartment? Someone besides me is cleaning? Scott is cleaning? I must be dreaming.”

“I figured I was due to do some cleaning up around here.”

“That's very nice of...wait! What'd you do?”

“What do you mean?”

“Did you spill something? Break something? What was it? What are you trying to cover up?” Tabitha walks over to the table and starts sniffing.

“Did you just..sniff..the table? Can't a guy lend a hand around here without getting the 2^nd degree?”

“You mean 3^rd degree.” Sara corrects from the couch.

“I had it right. First you came in here and gave me a hard time, and now Tabitha's on my case. That's two degrees.”

“Are you saying that you didn't spill something?”

“I'm just saying a guy should be able to clean his own table without being grilled by his roommates.”

“I'm surprised you even knew where the cleaning supplies were.”

“You had them under the sink. No creativity at all. Everyone puts their cleaning supplies under the sink.”

“Yes, you're so uncreative Tabitha. If Scott was putting things away, we could get the windex right out of the fridge.”

“And the ice cream would probably be stored in cabinets, and the milk would never leave the counter.”

“That's not true. Once the milk got chunky I'd probably throw it away.”

“Yeah, but you probably wouldn't empty the trash until it really started to smell.”

“Is there any other reason to empty the trash?”

“You know, some days I wish we could vote you out of the apartment.”

“Oooh! Survivor: 6^th Floor!”

“And that's how I'll catch you.” Tabitha opens up the trash and looks in, seeing two cartons of milk.

“Did you spill BOTH cartons of milk?!”

“No?”

“How'd you manage that? You know what, I don't want to know. You better be going downstairs to replace them.”

“I already got on him about that. I can't have breakfast in the morning without my milk.”

“I'll get the milk. Plenty of milk. We'll all get that milk.”

“Good. I'd hate for Sara to have to milk you in the morning.”

Tabitha walks into her room, ignoring Scott and Sara staring at her in shock at her comment.

Mario Kart Eats More Chicken

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: Mario Kart Eats More Chicken

We had a little respite from the heat today and we all decided to walk over to Starbucks, where Scott was currently at work. We grabbed the coveted spots around the big coffee table and started chit-chatting. Scott came over while neglecting his customers and his cleaning duties.

“Happy Cow Appreciation Day Scott.”

“Cow Appreciation Day? We supposed to chow down on lots of burgers or something?”

“That wouldn't be very appreciative of the cows would it? It's on my Chick-Fil-A calendar. Their motto is 'Eat Mor Chikin'. If you go there dressed as a cow, you get a free combo meal.”

“Do we even have any of those anywhere near here?”

“I know there is one in the Paramus Park Mall in Jersey.”

“I don't know if it's worth it to drive to Paramus for fast food.”

“Frank Bruni said there was one in one of the NYU food courts.”

“Who the hell is Frank Bruni? Your secret boyfriend?”

“Huh? No Frank Bruni is one of the food critics for the Times. He took some fast food trip a couple of years ago and mentioned the place. I haven't heard anyone else mention the food court, and I don't know if it's open in the summer anyway.”

“Even if they let us in, it's probably manned by college students that don't know we'd get a free combo with a cow suit anyway.”

“True. Maybe one lazy weekend we'll goad Frank into driving to Paramus.”

“Hey, today's Friday the 13th!” says Billy, looking up from a discarded newspaper.”

“No full moon though.”

“We should watch scary movies tonight.”

“I suppose it's fitting, even if it is rather cliché.”

“We never watched a lot of those Horrorfest movies. We should rent one or two.”

“I'd be in for that. I actually found this blog that reviews horror movies for fun. It's a Scream says that Dark Ride was good, but Wicked Little Things was not much of a horror flick.”

“Okay, so we'll skip Wicked Little Things then. We saw Unrest and Abandoned already in theaters. Abandoned was really freaky, but it was certainly scary. Unrest was also a little scary, and made me glad I wasn't a med student for sure.”

“It still bothers me where she was staying. There had to be better housing right?”

“Yeah, but that probably wouldn't have been as frightening. We'll pick up the movies on the way back to the 6^th floor.”

“Why are you referring to the apartment as the 6^th floor now?”

“Whoops. I must be reading the blog too much. Ann's gotten to me I think.”

“Excellent! Oh, did you guys know it's National Ice Cream Month? And Sunday is National Ice Cream Day? Ronald Reagan's idea.”

“I'm Ronald Reagan, and I approved this sundae.”

“How do you celebrate National Ice Cream Day?”

“How do you think? You're such a dope.”

“Dope.” Billy says, punching Scott playfully.

“Did any of you see that video from E3 about Mario Kart for the Wii?”

“They're making a new Mario Kart? Awesome! Did it look good?”

“Yeah, it did actually. They hyped up the online aspect of it, and they're debuting a new Wii toy, a steering wheel, with it.”

“A steering wheel? That's pretty silly isn't it?”

“Yeah, the remote kind of fits into it. The video kind of made me feel old though. He said the Wii Wheel will offer a new feel for those who 'first started racing with Mario Kart, 15 years ago.' 15 years! Has it really been that long?”

“'92? That IS a long time ago. I still think that one is one of the best Mario Karts of them all. Did they mention battle mode?”

“Yup. There's going to be a battle mode. You'll be able to play that over the Internet too.”

“Sweet. We'll be able to whoop some kid's butt in Alabama or something. I look forward to that. I hope it's good.”

“Aww, be nice to the little brats. The Mario Kart games are actually older than they are.”

“Now THAT makes me feel old.”

“If you guys are done salivating over video games, we should head back and pick up the movies. Besides, Scott's getting an evil eye from George.”

“He's just upset I haven't refilled the milk yet. I'll just tell him we shouldn't serve milk today because it's Cow Appreciation Day.”

“I'm sure that will work wonders.”

Milk Fight

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Tabitha, Frank, and Scott.

Subject: Milk Fight!

“No! You go get it, I have to work today!”

“You don't work until three! That is hours from now!”

“It's a mental preparation thing! I don't want to go to the store!”

“I don't care! You took the last of the milk, you go replace it!”

“You're the one that wants it, you replace it!”

“I bought the milk last time. You never buy anything!”

“What do you want milk for anyway? Water's healthier!”

“Water with cereal is just disgusting!”

“Maybe you shouldn't have cereal then!”

“Maybe you shouldn't have finished all the milk!”

Tabitha stumbles out of her room in a daze.

“What the fuck are you guys arguing about milk at 7am for? Some of us are actually trying to sleep!”

“And did either of you even check the fridge? Look! Here's another carton behind the birch beer. So you're keeping me up for nothing!”

“But..this is 2%..”

“Oh? Do you have a problem with that?!”

“Uhhh, no. 2% is fine. Great. I love it. Go back to bed Tabitha.”

“Alright. If i wake up to find out one of you used up the last of the bread, I will hunt you down. Mark my words.”

Tabitha returns to her bedroom.

“2%? People drink that stuff?”

“I think I'll just have a bagel.”