Take it Like a Man

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: Training Wheels

As if you would expect us to be anywhere else...We're at a bar a little downtown from us. Ashley is still here, it's a little after New Years. We're having a little 'going away drink fest' for her. Surprised?

“Another Tom Collins Ann? You're really on the gin tonight.”

“Tasty stuff. But I'm worried you haven't had enough. Would you like this? I could get another.”

“No no, I'm fine. I still have half my Bacardi and cola here.”

“Fiiine.” Ann slurs.

“Tequila Shots? Ann? Tequila? Tabitha. Tequila!”

Frank takes a tally, and has the server bring over six shots, only Tabitha abstaining.

Ashley: “Woah, you're going to use the training wheels? Kinda girly don't you think?” Ashley says to Scott, as he reaches for the salt and lemon.

“Girly? I thought that's how you were supposed to do them?”

“Bah. Do it like a real man Scott.”

“Fine.” Scott puts the lemon down.

“There is an exception though.”

“Body ssshots! Right?”

“Yeah. As long as you're licking the salt directly off a hot girl.”

“Hmm...” Scott looks at Ashley and starts reaching for the lemon and salt.

Ashley: “Don't even think about it.”

Sara smacks Scott.

“Cheers everyone!” Billy says, raising his shot glass, sans lemon.

Everyone: “Cheers!”

“Delicious! I love tequila.” Billy proclaims, putting his glass down.

“So why do they call the lemon and salt training wheels anyway?”

“Beats me. Google it.”

“No way I can type straight on my phone tonight. Later.”

Entertaining Ashley

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: Sara’s Sister

We’re all hanging around in the living area with Sara’s sister Ashley who’s here visiting until after New Years.

“So Ashley, what are you going to do while you’re here?”

Ashley: “Oh, well, whatever Sara wants to do, you know? I’m really just here to visit her. And get up to Zabars.”

“Ahh, yes, the yearly pilgrimage to Zabars.”

“Zabars. So cliché, I suppose you want to go to Times Square and take a picture with the naked cowboy as well?”

Ashley: “No no, that's touristy stuff! I do want to try to go to that cool restaurant you guys took me to last time I was here though.”

“You mean Catalina's? I don't know if I'd call it cool.”

“I certainly don't think it's cool. You should check out that Italian place downtown that we went to last month.”

“That place was delish! Those Raviolis...mmmmmmm” Billy rubs his stomach contently.

Ashley stares oddly at Billy for a second. “I'm really not into Italian.”

Frank gasps.

“Just stick to the tried and true plan. Never fails.”

“Drinking?”

“Drinking!!”

Billy grins and high fives Scott. “Drinking!”

Ashley: “Is that all you guys do?”

Tabitha giggles.

Ashley: “How about we just walk around, take in the sights?”

“It's kind of cold..”

“Aww, don't be a wuss Tabitha. Just walk faster and it's not too bad.”

“We can just make frequent hot chocolate stops.”

Ashley: “Sounds good to me.”

Toast Freedom

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: 75^th Anniversary of Repeal Day

“So I get out three hours early on Friday. It’s our holiday party instead of a party.”

“Err…what was that?”

“Instead of a party, they’re just letting us go three hours early.”

“You could get started drinking early for Repeal Day.”

“Maybe. It’s the 75^th anniversary this year right?”

“I believe so. It really is a great holiday, you’ve got American History, drinking..it appeals to everyone!”

“Well, everyone except prohibitionists.”

“Those people don't exist anymore. Do they? DO THEY?!”

“Sure. There are still plenty of dry counties out there. The place where they make Jack Daniels

for one. Plenty of people still seem to think alcohol is a bad thing and a sin or something.”

“Silly (other) Americans!”

“I think I'll hit McSorley's..despite it not being historically friendly towards women.”

“Straight from the website, 'Established in 1854 – McSorley's can boast of being New York City's oldest continuously operated saloon.' It survived prohibition, and I think that's deserves a couple of half-pints of dark in it's honor. I'll meet you there after work.”

“Sweet!”

“I have to agree, this is the best drinking holiday of them all. There's too much green on St. Patrick's Day, and it's too Irish, not American. The night before Thanksgiving is nice, but no

one wants to be hungover and have to cook a turkey. New Years Eve is a great day too though.”

“I'd say New Years is more of a family holiday, a celebration of new beginnings, new chances, and the Twilight Zone.”

“Greatest drinking holiday or not, I'm going to make an effort on Friday.”

“Shouldn't be too hard at a great place like that. Hmm..do I want light first, or dark?”

“We'll get both and split them.”

“Smart.”

Failure to Drink

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject:  Failure to Drink

 

“Come on, it’s raining harder now!”

 

“Beer.  It’s rain or shine, we can’t back out now!”

 

“No one ever died from being a little wet.  Drink another beer and we’ll be fine.”

 

“I do agree, it’s raining.”

 

“And the sky is blue, and that couple over there is really in to each other!”

 

“Wow, they’re really going at it.”

 

“I guess that’s one thing to do while we wait.”  Frank eyes Sara.

 

“Get those dirty eyes off of me!”

 

“Really now, we’re going to spend the next four plus hours standing in the rain drinking tiny glasses of beer and waiting in line?”

 

“You’re so pleasant when you’re wet Tab.”

 

“That’s what she said!” Frank yells.

 

“Good one Frank!”

 

“I’m singing in the rain..Such a ..”

 

“Oh my god! Stop singing!”  Sara shoves Ann.

 

“Yeah, stick to the writing Ann.  You can’t carry a tune.”

 

“This line to get in is so long! I want my beer!”

 

“Can we please go somewhere and drink inside at least?  Do we really need to drink in the rain? Is the beer here really that good?”

 

“Okay, Okay . Fine.  Let’s go fine an indoor bar.  SoHo, or around here?”

 

“Let’s just get inside and dry off.  We can always move uptown later.”

 

“I guess if we’re drying out, I’ll get a dry martini.”

 

“Are you 80?  Do people are age drink dry martinis?  Do you even like gin?”

 

“Gin? That’s what they put in martinis?  Weird.”

 

“I’m in the mood for a Cosmo.”

 

“Cosmos all around!”

 

Scott looks at Billy and Frank.  “Are we okay with drinking cosmos?”

 

“They are a little girly.”

 

“Looks like the Mets are going to make the Playoffs.”

 

Scott and Frank grunt.

 

“Okay, that’s manly enough.  I guess we can have Cosmos.”

 

“That was…special.  Come on, there’s a bar over there.”  Tabitha leads them into a nearby bar.

 

“Crowded.  Looks like we’re not the only ones getting out of the rain.”

 

“I guess alcohol is alcohol.  Beer is beer.”

 

“That may be the smartest thing you’ve said all day.”  Sara says sarcastically.

 

“To make up for it, we can go to Brewtopia at the Javits Center.  I think it’s in early November.”

 

“You saying you weren’t going to suggest we go there anyway?”

 

“Beer tastes different in November…we’re obligated to be there.”

 

“You’re not going to rest until you’ve drank everywhere in New York, are you?”

 

“Maybe not even then.”

 

Beer Garden

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: Beer Garden

“There! Quick, grab it!”

Frank maneuvers through the crowd and quickly sits at a table of a recently departed group of Asian guys.

“Good grab.” Ann says, sliding into the table across from Frank. “I hate when we have to stand here, makes it hard to have more than one pitcher of beer at a time.”

“We haven’t been to the beer garden in ages. This place is great!”

“It is nice to drink in the fresh air once in a while, instead of those dank, dirty bars. Guess it’s one of the few nice things about Queens.”

Sara coughs as a cloud of cigarette smoke drifts by. “Well, semi-fresh air anyway.”

“Where’d Billy go?”

“Presumably to get us our first pitcher of beer.”

“Nope. Food.” Ann points out Billy on line outside the food tent.

“Fine, I guess I’ll get the first pitcher. I shall return.”

“I’m going to join Billy, I want some food in me so I don’t get too drunk.”

“Anyone want anything?” Tabitha asks as she gets up.

“Nah, I ate already.” Sara says, as Ann and Scott shake their heads.

“Did we remember to bring cards or a game or something?”

“I’ve got a deck of cards. We should’ve brought Killer Bunnies!”

“Bunnies? You know someone would just spill something on it and ruin the cards. Ann can be such a clutz.”

“Thanks. We could’ve brought UNO or something. That’s simple and mindless.”

“We’ve got cards, I think we can manage.”

“We could make like that table over there, and play Jenga!”

“Drinking Jenga? I wonder how that’d work?”

“I don’t think it would. After a little while I can’t imagine any game lasting long.”

Tabitha and Billy return carrying plates of food. Tabitha has a veggie burger and fries, and Billy has two foot long bratwursts and fries.

“Didn’t pour me a beer yet? You’re slacking Frank!”

“I’m still trying to decide what kind of joke to make about you eating those gigantic brats.”

The usual shenanigans continued from there. Before we knew it, the sun had set and we were on our 5^th pitcher of beer. 7^th pitcher of beer? Before we knew it, we’d lost count of how many pitchers of beer we’d drank, and how many French fries we’d thrown at each other. Somehow we’d ended up playing Rummi 500 of all games.

“I’m still waiting for a third three. I can’t believe we haven’t come across it yet.”

“I think we lost a handful of cards to the spilt beer pitcher of game two.”

“Did we only lose threes? This is insane!” Tabitha exclaims, as she draws a card from the deck.”

“Well, the odds of two of the seven cards we lost being threes would..”

“No math! This isn’t poker and we’re drinking, not mathing!”

“At least we don’t have a silly ‘asshole hat’ made out of napkins like that table of college kids that stumbled out of here 40 minutes ago.”

“Aww, I thought the hat was cool!”

“I really thought there weren’t supposed to be drinking games here.”

“I think they just mean take over the tables and play huge games of beer pong.”

“Better this way anyway, I rock at beer pong and you would’ve been embarrassed.”

“Don’t be so sure!”

“Aren’t we a little old for beer pong?”

“You’re never too old for beer pong!”

“You and Scott will be playing beer pong in your retirement homes I’m sure. One more round? Or should we stumble out of here?”

“Should we stop at that diner before getting on the train?”

“Are you really hungry after those two giant bratwurst?”

“That was..hours ago! The diner’s supposed to be good.”

“Can you taste anything anymore? We’ve eaten there before..I just don’t remember if it was good.”

“I don’t remember being disgusted with it.”

“I don’t think I remember it at all.”

“All the more reason to try it again.”

“Why not? We know better than to get between you and food anyway.”

We got up and made our way down (or was it up?) the street to the diner. I remember someone ordered pancakes, but not much else. Billy’s insisting that it’s the best diner he’s ever eaten at in the City, but I think he’s ashamed to admit he doesn’t remember much either.

(Has anyone noticed the blog acting weird? It seems like it’s combining posts so that text doesn’t match the titles and screwing up in IE (and chrome Sara tells me).)

Exciting Plans

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: The endless opportunities

“We should have some fun this Saturday!”

“Why specifically this Saturday? Win a big pot and have some money to burn?”

“If that's the case, let's have you treat us all to an expensive steak house.”

“Maybe I'm just tired of sitting in front of my computer and want to get out and have fun?”

“You? No way.”

“That'd be like Billy saying, 'No thanks, I'm full'.”

“That reminds me, I have a sandwich in the fridge to eat.” Billy pulls out a foot long sized package wrapped in Deli paper from the fridge.

“Nice Billy! We could drink at Catalina's.”

“We always do that.”

“Movie?”

“We always do that too.”

“Isn't it possible we always do these things because they're fun?”

“Can't we try something different once in a while?”

“Like..?”

“I don't know...I talked to Sue yesterday, she's moving to Fair Lawn, NJ in September and would love some help packing up her stuff.”

“Fat chance!”

“Doesn't she have a new husband to help with that? I distinctly remember a wedding to some guy a couple of weeks ago. And weren't there big burly brothers?”

“I'm surprised you 'distinctly' remember anything from that night. I wasn't sure they were going to be able to afford to move out after they got your bar tab.”

That's my secret weapon. Remembering!”

“Frank, you haven't fully remembered a night of drinking in years.”

“Oh come on! I'm not that bad! What about that night two weeks ago when we went to the bar after Dark Knight? I remember all of that!”

“That's because we mostly sat in silence watching the baseball games. Not much to remember.”

“Fine then. Next time I'll just forget whose turn it is to pay.”

“So business as usual?”

“As long as you don't whip out four aces and exclaim 'I win! You pay!' we'll be alright.”

“And no more calling me fish..man, that doesn't make any sense!”

“How did this conversation go from thinking of a plan for Saturday to making fun of me?”

“I'm good with anything. As long as it's not sipping wine coolers and playing Go Fish.”

“I'm with the no 'Go Fish' rule.”

“I suppose we'll just end up drinking, regardless. We could watch the Olympics and drink to that..”

“One drink every time someone says 'Michael Phelps'.”

“Or not..we'd be drunk pretty fast at that rate.”

“Guess we'll come up with something last minute...as always.”

“We could go to the Ren Faire..”

“Yeah! Except I think Tab's busy this Saturday afternoon. Another time.”

“Olympics and drinking...we lead such exciting lives.”

The Cure for What Ails You

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy

Subject: Achoo!

Ann comes out of her bedroom, carrying a plastic bag for of tissues and dumps it in the garbage.

“How are you feeling?”

“Weak, sleepy and stir-crazy. At least I’m not really sneezing anymore.”

“That’s better than last week, when you looked half-dead and were sneezing more regularly than Mount Rushmore.”

“Does Mount Rushmore sneeze? That’d be a sight to see.”

“I think he means Old Faithful, at least I hope so.”

“Doh! That’s right, Old Faithful. Although I can see it now..Sniffling presidents on the side of a mountain being the spokespeople for Kleenex.”

“I’m surprised the advertisers haven’t done it already.”

Ann, who had returned to her room, now comes out with an armful of sheets and blankets.

“So you’re weak and tired and your first thought is ‘laundry!’?”

“I’m trying to clean my room of all the germs.”

“You’re probably immune to all the germs you already had though.”

“We’re not however, so dragging your disease-infested blankets through the kitchen will probably just get the rest of us sick.”

“If you haven’t caught it already, you probably won’t.”

“Or you’re just exposing us to the reinforcements and they’ll finally break through our immune systems.”

“Scott was sniffling when he left for work this morning actually.”

“Ooops. He can just have some of those silly Vivanno smoothies at Starbucks..keep him strong. Yeah..So I suppose that means none of you want to wash these for me?” Ann offers the blankets to Frank.

“Not a chance. I’ll warm you up some chicken soup, but that’s as helpful as I’m going to be.”

“Ugh. I’m sick of chicken soup. No thanks.”

“Hot Toddy?”

“That sounds like a billion times better.”

“I’m on it.” Billy says, headed for the liquor cabinet and the whiskey.

All-Star Aftermath

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Billy and Scott.

Subject: How we fared

Wasn’t going to bother with an aftermath post, (Alright, I’m just lazy), but Brave Astronaut asked in a comment: “So the game went on longer than many expected. Anyone up yet there on the sixth floor? Did anyone make it to the end? I fell asleep in the 13th. No drinking was involved, unfortunately. I'm just old.” So since I/we don’t get many commenter requests I figured I’d acquiesce (Never used that word before, it’s a bugger to spell), and rather than a comment reply which chances are he’d never check back to see, I’d just post.

Ann: I’m not that into baseball, and I was going to read while we watched, but Sara made me put down my book and Scott forced beer into my hands and made me pay attention. I cheated a little and didn’t always drink when I was supposed to. (See? I can too cheat when I want to Scott!) When the game (both drinking and All-Star) deteriorated, I stopped drinking and was pretty much fine.

Sara: Sara was doing fine, until Billy Wagner blew the save. Sara points out that had he not let up runs last year, the NL would’ve won that one too. While she continued playing after that, She was also doing plenty of side-drinking too. She stumbled out of here this morning to go to work not looking pleasant, and she had _two_ travel mugs of coffee with her.

Tabitha: Tabitha likes baseball the least of any of us, but that led her to really pay attention to the drinking cues rather than any of the actual game. She switched between beer and weak kamikazis, so she was pretty much okay by morning.

Billy: Billy really took to the game, and since he was off Wednesday he didn’t even have to worry about work. Even though we did stay up for the end of the game, Billy had to ask Sara the score the next morning, because he didn't even remember that we stopped paying attention to the drinking game sometime in extra innings.

Scott: Scott's really developing a crazy tolerance. We joke that no longer can we buy a six pack and split it evenly, he has to get his own. Tonight Scott may have gone overboard, finding excuses to take shots all night long. There is a disturbingly empty looking bottle of gin in the sink (and cracked) and I'm hoping that most of it leaked out through that crack and not into Scott. Scott was all ready to start up a game of asshole after the game ended, and even got as far as bringing out the cards before we groaned at him. After the game ended he decided it was a good idea to make pancakes, which made some of us nauseous and the others hungry. This became funnier in the morning when Tab, not really hungover but very groggy, sat down at the table and ended up sitting in a half cooked left over pancake. Apparently Scott was experimenting with his pancake flipping abilities..drunk and lost one. I wish I'd gotten a picture.

All-Star Game Drinking Fun

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Billy

Subject: All-Star Drinking Game

“Help me with these.” Billy asks, as he comes through the door with a ton of boxes.

“What have you got there?” Ann asks, getting off the couch to help.

“I got some beer for the drinking game for the All-Star Game.”

“We're doing that again? Where's the game this year?”

“Umm..it's right here in New York. At Yankee Stadium. Where have you been?”

“Guess I tune out anything baseball.”

“I've devised a Yankee Stadium version of the game. I'm sure it'll be favorable to getting drunk via the Yankee Stadium lovefest I'm sure the game will be.”

“We're well stocked if it is.” Billy says, as he loads 6-packs into the fridge. Maybe we should drink for the Home Run Derby too.”

“Probably not enough action than that. Don't they usually hit like 40 home runs?”

“Usually a little less than that. But we could make it simple, just each pick a player, and take a shot for each home run they hit. We'd have to switch it up to keep us from dying though, so if you're player advances, you win and don't drink anymore, and a loser takes up your player.”

“We could try that. If we get too plastered too fast, we'll just stop drinking to the derby, and just drink.”

“Seems fair enough to me. I'm going to need plenty of alcohol to get through two nights of baseball.”

“As long as we're still on to go to New Roc City to see Dark Prince next weekend.”

“Of course, providing we can all get up there.”

“Back to baseball though. I figure I'll need to drink for it too, I'm going to be sick of Yankees talk about 5 minutes in.”

“Sure Frank will love it though.”

“I'll just grill him about the Mets being better if he does.”

“The Mets are doing better now? When did that happen? Weren't they playing like crap?”

“Actually, they're on fire. They've won nine in a row. Only one win behind the Phillies.”

“Well, that's pretty good. I'd think they'd have to at least give them props for that during the game right?”

“Maybe they'll mention it when David Wright is up, but otherwise I doubt it.”

“Really down on the Fox broadcasters huh?”

“It's one of the reasons I try to get out to Shea on Saturdays. It means I don't have to listen to those guys when they do a game.”

“That's a good idea. Hey, we should all go to a game together this year. I haven't been out to Shea and I guess I should see it one more time right?”

“Sure, it'll be like a 6^th Floor does Shea experience.”

“And it'll give me something to blog about!”

“Well, we know where your priorities are Ann.”

Rest Stops

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank

Subject: Rest Stops

“I've got to use the bathroom. Can we pull off here?” Sara asks, as they near a rest stop on the thruway.

“Sure. I'm getting hungry anyway, we can get some food here.”

“Wake up Ann!” Sara says, nudging Ann.

“We're there?”

“No sleepyhead. Just a rest stop, food and bathroom break.”

“Oh..okay. I guess that late night shift I took last night might've been a bad idea.”

Ann and Sara head to the bathroom and Frank heads to the store. They meet in the lobby in a couple of minutes.

“Here, one of you carry this one.” Frank says, handing Sara one of three bags.

“Yikes! How much stuff did you get?”

“Just some snacks for the ride.”

“It's not even that far! What's in here?” Sara asks, peaking into the bag as they head to the car.

“Beef jerky? Why do we need beef jerky?”

“I dunno. Every rest stop seems to have it though, so it must be good.”

“You've also got a crappy rest area mug in here. Did you really need to buy this?”

“That's for Sara, so she doesn't have to drink her coffee in the room out of Styrofoam.”

“Thanks..I think.”

“Two big bags of chips, one barbecue. I guess I can get on board with that...but did you really need a map of eastern Pennsylvania?”

“You never know where we'll end up, and I don't have a map of Pennsylvania.”

“You've got a GPS. All the maps are preloaded.”

“Valid point. I probably didn't need the bag of trail mix either. I don't even like trail mix.”

“Oh, dibs on the trail mix.”

“Hey, there are shot glasses in here too. I guess you intend on doing shots in the hotel?”

“I can so get on board with that!”

“Just have to find the liquor store when we get up there. Shouldn't be hard, what else is there to do around there right?”

“Drink drink and more drink.”

“Cow tipping?”

“Cow tipping is more of a daytime activity. Then they retire to drink the night away.”

“Remind me why we're going to the middle of nowhere again?”

“Got anything better to do? Now open up those chips.”