Bagel Statistics

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Sara, Frank

Subject: Bagel Statistics

It's early morning and Sara is up to have breakfast before going to work and Frank is still up from spending the night gambling and watching cartoons.

“What have we got to eat around here?”

“I picked up bagels yesterday. I think there is a French toast in there.”

“Yesterday? Bagels are only at 85% quality when they're a day old.”

“You could always toast it.”

“Toasted bagels are always a flat 70% quality.”

“Unless it's a frozen or non-New York bagel.”

“Well yeah, then toasting actually improves it, but it's still around 60-70%.”

“Why would you eat a non-New York bagel anyway?”

“We didn't have a whole lot of choice down in South Carolina. I barely remember what breakfast was like before I came up here and could have bagels everyday.”

“Probably healthier.”

“I wouldn't go that far. Southern food is anything but healthy.”

“What do you figure, bagels degrade exponentially?”

“Yeah. You figure it's around 85% after one day, but I'd say it drops to almost 60% by the day after, and becomes an almost inedible 25% by that third day.”

“That's why we freeze them after the first day or so.”

“Yup, it's just logical. Once the quality of the bagel drops closer to the toasted quality, you might as well freeze them to preserve them.”

“I really like frozen salt bagels after a day of sitting. The salt melts a little, and then you toast them and make them nice and warm, and salty without being overpoweringly salty.”

“And the toasting keeps them from being mushy from the melted salt, yeah.”

“Often a good topping, be it salt or everything or poppy can boost a bagel an extra 5% or so.”

“Yeah, that's true. A bad bagel is made worse when it's a plain bagel with no other flavor to hide behind. That's why I wish I could find a place that makes good chocolate cream cheese.”

“Chocolate? I've only seen chocolate chip, but I've always assumed it's way too sweet for a bagel.”

“They are. The chocolate taste is nice, but it's too sweet, they need to use dark chocolate or cocoa powder or something. I gotta go now, enjoy your day, or night, or whatever you're up to.”

“Don't work too hard.”

“Oh, I won't.”

Rest Stops

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank

Subject: Rest Stops

“I've got to use the bathroom. Can we pull off here?” Sara asks, as they near a rest stop on the thruway.

“Sure. I'm getting hungry anyway, we can get some food here.”

“Wake up Ann!” Sara says, nudging Ann.

“We're there?”

“No sleepyhead. Just a rest stop, food and bathroom break.”

“Oh..okay. I guess that late night shift I took last night might've been a bad idea.”

Ann and Sara head to the bathroom and Frank heads to the store. They meet in the lobby in a couple of minutes.

“Here, one of you carry this one.” Frank says, handing Sara one of three bags.

“Yikes! How much stuff did you get?”

“Just some snacks for the ride.”

“It's not even that far! What's in here?” Sara asks, peaking into the bag as they head to the car.

“Beef jerky? Why do we need beef jerky?”

“I dunno. Every rest stop seems to have it though, so it must be good.”

“You've also got a crappy rest area mug in here. Did you really need to buy this?”

“That's for Sara, so she doesn't have to drink her coffee in the room out of Styrofoam.”

“Thanks..I think.”

“Two big bags of chips, one barbecue. I guess I can get on board with that...but did you really need a map of eastern Pennsylvania?”

“You never know where we'll end up, and I don't have a map of Pennsylvania.”

“You've got a GPS. All the maps are preloaded.”

“Valid point. I probably didn't need the bag of trail mix either. I don't even like trail mix.”

“Oh, dibs on the trail mix.”

“Hey, there are shot glasses in here too. I guess you intend on doing shots in the hotel?”

“I can so get on board with that!”

“Just have to find the liquor store when we get up there. Shouldn't be hard, what else is there to do around there right?”

“Drink drink and more drink.”

“Cow tipping?”

“Cow tipping is more of a daytime activity. Then they retire to drink the night away.”

“Remind me why we're going to the middle of nowhere again?”

“Got anything better to do? Now open up those chips.”

Sara's New Job

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank and Scott.

Subject: Sara's New Job

Sara strolls in around seven o'clock and plops on the couch, gesturing to Frank and then to the fridge.

“So how was your first day of work Sara?”

Frank grabs two beers from the fridge, opens them and hands one to Sara.

“Could've gone better.” Sara says, after a long pull from the beer bottle.

“The people nice?”

“Too early to tell. They seem nice enough. Jersey City is a freaking dump though.”

“Didn't we tell you that Jersey sucked?”

“North Jersey is nice. I don't think I've been to Jersey City though. Not nice huh?”

“Nope. Path train isn't too bad though. The seats are more uncomfortable, but there are much less people on it than the subway.”

“Reverse commute I guess. That's nice at least.”

“They had trouble setting up some of my accounts, so I wasn't even able to do much. A lot of reading.”

“Weren't prepared for you? But you accepted like three weeks ago!”

“I know. Hopefully not a sign of things to come.”

“It'll probably get better when you settle in.”

“Speaking of settling in, they don't have a space for me yet. My desk is literally in the kitchen, with four other people.”

“In the kitchen? That's classic. I always knew a woman's place was in the kitchen..”

“At least you're not far from your precious coffee beans.”

“I wish I was farther! You know how hard it is to take a break to get coffee when the machine's practically on your desk?!”

“Oooh..that sucks. And you don't smoke, so you can't even take a smoke break.”

“Take your coffee breaks by leaving and getting Starbucks.”

“Actually, there is no Starbucks in Journal Square. There is a Dunkin' Donuts, but no Starbucks. It's a horrible place.”

“Who knows, maybe you'll find something better elsewhere. At least you have insurance right?”

“Yeah, I will in two months. And I actually get transportation reimbursement which is cool.”

“That is pretty nifty. Another beer?”

“Definitely. Bring one for Scott too, I saw him eying mine when he walked in.”

“I just love your bottles.”

“That doesn't even make any sense.”

“You might as well have one too Ann.” Frank says, passing out beer.

“Terrific. Tuesday night, Friday night. It's always time for beer right?”

“It's always happy hour somewhere in the world. Cheers!” Scott raises his beer bottle, and the others clink theirs to his.

6th Floor Blog goes the the Movies

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: 6^th Floor Blog goes to the Movies: Iron Man

Frank and Scott are standing in the lobby of the movie theater waiting for the others who are in the bathroom.

“I understand why Billy has to use the bathroom, he drank that entire extra large sized soda, but the girls didn’t drink a drop! They can’t wait until we get home?”

“Girls to bathrooms like flies to honey.”

“That movie was excellent. Best comic book movie in a while.”

“The Mad Money slash Jim Kramer part was pretty funny. That guy is great.”

“Sell Sell Sell!”

“The house of pain!”

“Great movie huh? Slice of pizza on the way home?”

“How about a hot dog?”

“Whatever powers the Arc Reactor!”

“I don't think it's hot dogs.”

“I'd go for a hot dog.” Sara says, as the girls return from the bathroom.

“It's too early to head home. We should at least get some food, or some drinkee drinkees.”

“I'm in the mood for a good Cosmopolitan. That movie was okay, but I still like Spiderman best of all these comic book movies you drag me to.”

“You just like Tobey Maguire.”

Tabitha blushes, “Is that not a valid reason to like a movie?”

“I liked all his cars. Very cool.”

“Yeah, I liked this movie. I think it was because Marvel actually made it, rather than selling the rights to someone else to make it.”

“Makes sense. Now, let's get out of here and get some drinking in!”

“Amen to that!” Sara says, heading for the door.

Ann's Movie Note

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Frank

Subject: Ann plans for the weekend

“Hey Sara. We should go see Iron Man this tonight.”

“I saw Ann's note. I'm good with it.”

“Ann's note?”

Sara points to a piece of looseleaf under the “Eat Me” magnet on the fridge.

--Hey guys! It's Saturday morning, and no one else is around/awake. I think Billy or Scott was up earlier, and may be at work. I don't know. I'm headed out to meet an old friend for breakfast, and I'll probably get some coffee on the way back, and then I'll see if Scott is working, or just sleeping late. All of this is irrelevant to why I'm writing this note, as is the fact that I'll probably get a caramel macchiato when I go. We should all see Iron Man tonight. I know we've discussed wanting to see it, so I'm saying, we're doing it tonight. It's, predictably, playing all the time on multiple screens, so we shouldn't have too much of a problem. I'll mention this note to Scott if he's working, but if he's not, I probably won't. Mainly because he won't be there to mention it to. I'm in the mood for a big ole tub of popcorn with lots of greasy butter tonight. Who's with me? What do those things cost nowadays? They as much as the movie? I guess I'll find out tonight won't I? I bet Billy knows the answer to this though, it's rare he goes a movie without a snack. Anyway, I better get going, I'm going to be late.

P.S. My cellphones dead, so I'll be out of contact. Hmm, I hope my friend shows up on time since she can't call me. Oh..I should probably go be there on time myself then.

P.P.S. I'm going to ask you guys about May tonight..be warned.

“Oh, I guess it's decided then. That's easy enough. I want a hot dog.”

If you don't want to get run over, get off the sidewalk!

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Sara, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: Pedestrian Roadkill!

“Frank..dude..you totally got owned by that taxi driver!”

“I haven't gotten fighting down yet..it's harder than San Andreas!”

“I'm not usually a huge fan of watching video games, but Grand Theft Auto is different.”

“There is something captivating about watching a video game car carom all over the place taking out fire hydrants and pedestrians and light posts.”

“Damn! Look at that detail! Water gushing from where you hit the hydrant, and you can see the spiderwebs of cracks and blood on the windshield from where the cop shot you.”

“Wow...I guess you can get shot in the car now. I told you it was harder!”

“And it's not as easy to just walk up to a cop and beat the crap out of him. Apparently they can arrest you standing, and they immediately shoot at you if you move.”

“I wonder if any of that will change any as the game goes on.”

“Only one way to find out. Hey, two stars! You've got a couple of cops on your tail and your car is smoking bad!”

“Yeah, I gotta find an alley or something..out of the way taxi!”

“Hey..my cars not moving...am I stuck on something?”

Niko: “Come on...start!” (Niko's the main character in the game)

“It stalled? Cars can stall?”

“And now it seems to be on fire. I'd get out of that.”

Frank climbs out and jumps over a wall to hide from the cops.

“Wow..that takes a long time to blow up.” Frank says, after the car finally explodes.

“That was pretty cool.”

“Hey, it says you have a text message.”

“Yeah, that's my first girlfriend. We're supposed to go bowling or something.”

“You're setting the ringtone on your phone? The detail on this game is crazy!”

“It doesn't seem to be quite as big as San Andreas.”

“I guess that's alright. There was a lot of cool stuff in San Andreas, but sometimes driving between cities was a pain.”

“Okay, you should actually go on the missions, advance the game and stuff.”

“Yeah, this way I can get some cool weapons!”

Frank plays the game a bit, and is now on a date with his girlfriend and they're going to the carnival. (Coney Island)

“Hahaha! That's great, not only do they have Coney Island, it's closed because someone's going to build condos!”

“Nice walk along the boardwalk though. And it's neat that you can actually bowl. I wonder if you are supposed to let her win?”

“No! You can't let her win!”

“Yeah! Screw her. Between the new job, and the new game, I'm not going to have time for anything else for a while.”

“What else is there?”

6th Floor blog Plans a Trip

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: 6^th Floor Blog plans a trip

Scott gets a plate and a fork out of the cabinets and walks over to the chocolate cake sitting on the counter to have a slice when Tabitha walks up behind him and snatches the fork from him.

“You can't eat Sara's cake before she gets home!”

“Did I hear cake?” Billy asks, strolling out of his room with his nose in the air. “Smells good.”

“Have you been home this entire time? We just assumed you were working when you didn't show up when the apartment started smelling like chocolate cake.”

“Nope, working tonight. I just assumed I was having a chocolate cake craving, I didn't really think you were baking on a Monday!”

“Is Monday a non-baking day?”

“Isn't that why most bakeries are closed on Mondays? It must be a bad day for baking.”

“This cake smells good at least, so maybe Tabitha's the exception to the rule.”

“Why is it Sara's cake, and why can't I have any?”

“We're celebrating that she found a new job. She's off getting her physical and drug screen right now.”

She'll be back in time for dinner though right? We were going to watch the Mets game tonight since the Yankees are off.”

“Probably, it's just a physical. She had to go to Jersey City for it though.”

Sara walks in just then.

“She's early! Surprise Sara! Cake!”

“I thought something smelled good.”

“So you got a new job? Where? Doing what? Are you going to start paying for coffee again?”

“It's in Jersey City, so I'll have to play on the Path train everyday. It's ..well I don't really know what my job would be. Sorta tech support for some of their applications. Not a perfect job, but good enough for now. Well it'll be at least three weeks before I get my first paycheck, so don't expect me to pay for coffee before that!”

“Sara's here now. Can we eat the cake?”

“Shouldn't we have dinner first?”

“You made me dinner too?”

“No..I forgot all about making dinner. Pizza delivery anyone?”

“Cake!”

Scott and Billy start chanting “Cake! Cake! Cake!” and pretty soon Frank and Sara join in too.

“I guess we're having the cake for dinner. We could order pizza for dessert?”

“Good idea. And some garlic knots. Gotta love the knots.”

“So when do you start Sara?”

“Two weeks.”

“Wanna pre-spend your first paycheck and go to Cooperstown?”

“Cooperstown huh? I've never been..sure!”

“Anyone else want to come?”

“I'll come. Can we go to Howe's Caverns too?”

“Sure, that's one of the quintessential upstate New York tourist destinations I hear...have you been?”

“Years ago with my family.”

“This sounds like fun! When do you want to go?”

“You've got the physical and everything you need for work out of the way right? How about tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow? Not like I have anything to do..Can you get off work Ann? Anyone else?”

“I can, yes.”

“Nope.”

Scott and Tabitha shake their heads.

“Just us then. Good, we can all fit in my car.”

“Shotgun!”

“Doh!”

Warning Labels

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Ann, Sara, Tabitha, Frank, Billy and Scott.

Subject: Warning

“This bottle of Coke says be careful when opening, cap may explode...blah blah. Has anyone actually seen a cap blow off a soda bottle, much less injure someone?”

“Nope. I guess it's always possible though.”

“Remember that time I tried to make root beer in a two liter bottle and added two much yeast? Even then the cap didn't fly off.”

“Yeah, the bottle expanded so much that it cracked and the pressure from the fermentation pushed all of the liquid out, but the bottle was still pressurized and hard as a rock!”

“Then I opened it up and filled it with water to see where the leak was, but I couldn't find it.”

“Once you let the air out to put the water in, it depressurized and contracted back down and hid the cracks. Simple physics. Cool though.”

“Even with all that, the cap never blew off.”

“See? So it's a pointless warning.”

“The world's full of pointless warnings.”

“It's too bad friends don't come with warnings.”

“Warning: Geeky Caffeine-addict. May hyper-actively talk about newest video card model.”

“Hey, you didn't have to listen!”

“Warning: Narcoleptic Gambler. May decide to cook very aromatically seasoned steak at 5:30 am.”

“Hey, when you've got a hankering for steak..”

“It's not a very pleasing smell for a vegetarian to wake up to in the morning though.”

“I could buy a spinach air freshener for you if you like?”

Scott bursts out laughing.

“As long as you don't buy, and wear, that bacon cologne you showed me..”

“Warning: Anal-Retentive brunette is modern day Big Brother.”

“Anal-Retentive? I'm anal-retentive?” Tabitha yells, and starts hitting Scott.

“Ow! Ow! Did I mention you're very pretty?” Scott interjects, trying to duck Tabitha's blows..”

“Only very?” Tabitha queries, rearing her fist back as if to punch him again.

“Magnificantly, Very very! Most hotest!” Scott says quickly.

“Most hotest?”

“Sounds like something you would say about a stove..”

“Then it might apply best to the flame-haired one over there.” Billy says, indicating Ann.

“My hair's been blond for months!”

“Billy looks more closely. So it is..You changed it again!”

“Months ago! Last year!”

“No..”

“Yeah, no way. I would've noticed.”

“Had to be this week. Definitely.”

Tabitha rolls her eyes. “Guys! No wonder you can never describe to us what girls you meet look like.”

Coffee Intervention

Welcome to the 6^th floor.

Today's contributors are: Sara, Tabitha, Frank

Subject: Sara and her Joe

Sara's sitting at the table with her laptop and a cup of coffee, tapping away at the keys. Frank's watching television, and Tabitha is making herself a sandwich in the kitchen.

“So Sara, how's Joe?”

“Joe? Who's Joe? Are you dating someone new and didn't tell me?”

“I have no idea what he's talking about. I'm not dating anyone that I know of.”

“I meant your coffee. It seems like I never see you without that coffee mug or Starbucks cup anymore.”

“That's not true! Yesterday I had a Juan Valdez cup!”

“Have you tried..and I know this will sound odd, a good night's sleep? It's not like you have work to get up for.”

“Good night's sleep? That's so 1920s.”

“1920s? Did they historically sleep more in the 1920s?”

“I don't know. Maybe?”

“I guess it was during prohibition. If they couldn't stay out until four drinking, I guess they could get to bed early.”

“Either way. It's a problem when you go to bed after Frank does.”

“Is there something inherently wrong with going to bed at 5am? You know, I wouldn't get this kind of criticism of my schedule in Las Vegas.”

“Well can't you even go to the dentist at 3am in Vegas? But this isn't Vegas, this is New York.”

“It's the city that never sleeps!”

“If it laid off the coffee, it'd be able to sleep!”

“Did you know that the first Starbucks opened in New York in 1994, the same year Friends started?”

“I think I did hear that actually.”

“Very telling.”

“So I'm keeping my coffee then. Besides, It's almost a sin for a programmer to give up things like coffee.”

“Well, the first web cam was created to see if the coffee pot was full so they didn't have to get up.”

“I've always wondered about that. I mean, if everyone could check the coffee pot, and no one got up if it was empty, how'd they ever get coffee?”

“I'm sure the secretary probably started filling it up.”

“Exactly.”

“We're moving towards that culture right? Soon we'll be able to query are fridge contents from a web browser, probably even turn on the oven too. We'll be able to cook dinner from our computer.”

“That would be excellent!”

“Lazy bums! There is some benefit to not sitting on the couch all day you know.”

“There is?”

“Blasphemy.”

Tabitha just rolls her eyes, and takes her sandwich into her room.